Thing to do in Homedale
My entire family is currently in Nashville to watch my sister compete in the Miss Teen USA pageant. Well, not my entire family, as I (being one of the members) am still here in good old Idaho. Since I'm currently unemployed I've been out here in Homedale watching the folks' house while they're gone - which I surely can't complain about considering they have an entire deep freeze stocked with frozen food - but the scenery around these parts is limited to churches, farm equipment, and dirt.
To keep myself busy, I've come up with a list of eight activities to get the most out of my Homedale, Idaho experience:
8) Go into the farm supply store dressed in overalls and my own sweat stains and ask "It's normal to hear voices in the fields, right?"
7) Hot-wire a combine from the local John Deere dealer and stage the world's biggest farm equipment demolition derby in the parking lot of the home town grocery store.
6) Set a field on fire and watch it burn from atop a barn.
5) Sit IN the field and set it on fire.
4) One word: "Hamm's."
3) Check out the 4-H babes down at the fairgrounds.
2) Go up to a policeman and say: "I'm sorry officer, my cool-dar has detected that you have exceeded that maximum allowable cool points... Meow."
1) Write on my blog while watching the bug zapper.
I know that plenty of you guys out there grew up (or still live) in small towns. Therefore, I'd like to hear any suggestions that you might have. Heck, even if you've never stepped foot outside the city limits of your urban utopia, you've no doubt at least seen a small berg on the T.V. So go ahead and post your ideas here in the 'leave comment' section of this story.
Don't be shy. The person that sends in the best idea(s) will get a big fat smooch* from me!
*Subject to the following terms and conditions: you must be: 1) A female, 2) Beautiful.
Those who do not meet such criteria will be awarded a sunflower seed instead.
3 Comments:
Hmmm...What else to do in a small town...? You could always just watch a lot of porn. Or ski off the back of an old pick-up in the dirt like in that Hillary Swank film. You take your pick.
I'm glad I checked this out because I was missing you since I haven't seen you in so long. Glad to know you're not lying dead in a gutter somewhere! =)
you could write a certain someone who has just moved away to the cheeseland. I am sure said person would love for you to use your time making sonets and cat sounds in said persons direction rather than the local poliece force. just a suggestion. Best of luck with the burning durby.
I'm a city girl, but your blog hit home for a few reasons... my mom has just moved to Tennessee, and I was trying to imagine what her days will consist of. Until reading your blog, I was picturing the ghetto urban scenes in 8 Mile... but now I'm picturing cornfields. Thank you for enlightening me. Now I know she made the right decision to leave her California life of Chai Lattes for a home in Hicksville, USA (Actually, I think it's Hickmann, but that is equally bad!). You don't know me, but I'm a friend of Angela's from back-in-the-day... I think we were 13 when she lived in California. Anyway... do country folk drink a lot of Coca Cola (and do they actually say the WHOLE title instead of just "Coke"?), or is that a myth?
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